Fare thee Well, O.C.

It's official...the O.C. will air its final episode this Thursday, in which it purports to "answer all of our questions." I know it's just a T.V. show, but I'm going to be sad because this show tended to connect with almost everyone who watched it at a very basic level. I most defeinitely connected with the show, the characters, and the things they got themselves into. So after one fantastic season, two very good seasons, and one marginal season, here is my underinclusive recap of my favorite people and moments of the O.C.

Characters

I. Ryan Atwood

Ryan was the protagonist of the entire story. Without his entry into the O.C., the series wouldn't have happened. His story was inspiring because in his hour of need, Ryan found hope and a new life he didn't think he could have. His stories taught everyone that family is not limited to bloodlines. Plus, he got some pretty hot women.

II. Sandy Cohen

What a great person. I've aspired to be Sandy Cohen many times. Public Defender, but married to a super rich, super hot woman. He has all of the advantages of wealth, but can look down piously at everyone around him. Sandy was the one character on the show who ALWAYS made the right moral decision. It was truly a comfort to see him in the show and believe that somewhere out there was a person who could be a compass to the community like Sandy.

III. Seth Cohen

People most often compare me to Seth. Initially I objected, because Seth is the comic book obsessed dork who never got any play. Okay, I can see why people made the initial comparison. However, Seth really transformed throughout the series to be a strong, wise, and incredibly loyal friend, son, and brother. He's someone to look up to. Plus, as with the other two, he got a fantastically hot chick. I'd be proud to be compared to Seth.

IV. Luke Ward

Luke was a major character in season one, then disappeared. However, he was such a badass and clueless tool that I have to include him. Were it not for Luke, none of us would quote the immortal line "Welcome to the O.C., bitch." There's a little of Luke in everyone. Sure of himself, but insecure at the same time and utterly clueless on the right way to handle things.

V. Julie Cooper

It's appropriate to list Julie next to Luke, since she did him. Well, she did alot of guys. Rather than comment on Julie's serpentine nature, I'll just list the people she did:

(1) Jimmy Cooper, (2) Caleb Nichol, (3) Jimmy Cooper Again, (4) Luke Ward, (5) Lance (the porn producer), (6) Dr. Neil Roberts, (7) Gordon Bullit, (8) Frank Atwood, (9) Random younger guy.

VI. Anna Stern

If I lived in the O.C., this is who I would have ended up with. Quirky, confident, and unafraid to be different from the high school cliques. Not to mention incredibly hot. She was a fountain of wisdom and never failed to mesmerize me with her ability to handle everything from pop quizes to hostage situations.

VII. Jimmy Cooper

Jimmy is the one I tend to compare myself to. He has the tendency to hesitate and be indecisive and in the process, makes some stupid mistakes. But he loves his family, is loyal to his friends, and is genuinely a very good guy. I was disappointed when the mob ran Jimmy out of Newport but fully expect his return in the final episode.

VIII. Caleb Nichol

I loved Caleb because he was such a jackass. He brought out my inner lawyer and made me root for being a prick. The actor, Alan Dale, was a fantastic pick to be the disapproving father in law of Sandy Cohen and shady businessman/gazillionaire at the top of Newport's heirarchy. I was pretty sad when he died at the end of season two, since it was clear nobody could really replace him. Barring the appearance of zombies, it is unlikely that he will return in the finale.

IX. Summer and Marissa

At first, Marissa was the hottest thing I had ever seen on TV. Then it was Summer. Then after Marissa became a temporary lesbian with the hot bartender Alexandra, it was Marissa again. After she died, it went back to Summer. But seriously, those two were great in the show together...Marissa as the depressed/concerned social queen and Summer as the gorgeous object of Cohen's affection.

Moments

The Greatest O.C. Villains

1. Caleb Nichol: He was a dichotomy of good and bad, but I definitely would not fuck with him.
2. Kevin Volchok: A total psycho, and the only one who committed murder in the O.C.
3. Oliver Trask: I thought Oliver was a little bitch and I would have solved the problem by beating his ass so badly he wouldn't have come back for nine episodes. But he still makes the list.
4. Trey Atwood: He had some good in him until he got coked up. Then he got shot.

The Heroes

1. Sandy Cohen: He saved Ryan's life, his family, and us all. God bless Sandy Cohen.
2. Ryan Atwood: Always knew the right time to throw a punch.
3. Summer Roberts: Although underplayed, she's pulled more people out of jams than anyone in the whole show.

The things I wish they had cut

1. Trey Atwood: Good lord, that went on about ten episodes too long.
2. The celebrities: The O.C. was great. It certainly did not need appearances by Paris Hilton, Steve-O, and some lame ass American Idol contestant.
3. DJ: I know the O.C. needed a Mexican at some point, but he didn't say anything and everything he did say did nothing to contribute to the plot.

Body Count

1. Caleb Nichol
2. Johnny
3. Lance(?)
4. Max
5. Marissa Cooper

What I wanted to see more of

1. Luke: What else is there to say? The tools are usually my favorite part of any show and Luke was most definitely that. However, he was a rare tool who turned out to be a good guy.
2. Jimmy: Jimmy is alot like me and I found it comforting to see someone like him getting so much support. Had he not bankrupted his clients, stole from trust accounts, slept with his ex-girlfriend's sister, got beat up at a charity ball, punched his benefactor in a Vegas VIP room and got beat up by the mob, he would have been an ordinary guy too.
3. Hailey Nichol: WOW, was she ever hot. Disturbed, mystic, yet a good companion. And hot.
4. Zach Stevens: Zach was never a favorite of many people. That's probably because he was so normal and well-adjusted. Since he disappeared without explanation, I can only assume that Cohen murdered and buried him in the poolhouse.
5. Theresa: So whose baby is it really? How did she get so hot?
6. Lindsay Gardner: Lindsay was the illegitimate (and extraordinarily hot) daughter of Caleb Nichol who came and went during season two. Since she was Kirsten's half-sister and Ryan was Kirsten's adopted son, I think the fact that the two of them dated was probably incest. Drink heavily.

Drumroll...My Favorites

1. Cohen Standing on the table to proclaim his love of Summer. Dorks everywhere (including me) cheered for Cohen as he finally got the girl he had liked for so long. Two very different but very good people came together and this moment in TV actually triggers real emotion in me.
2. Sandy asking Ryan during Thanksgiving "how was home? (referring to Chino)" Ryan responded "I don't know, you tell me, I was in Chino."
3. Jeff Buckley's Hallelujia as Marissa died in Ryan's arms.
4. The Luke-Ryan fights in episodes 1-4. Especially where they burnt down the model home during the brawl.
5. Cohen juggling two women at once during the Thanksgiving episode.

As you might guess, it will be awhile before I can replace the gigantic void the loss of the O.C. will cause in my life. My "Things to live for" list is now down to (1) dog sledding, and (2) drinking. Needless to say, I will be out drinking in full force tomorrow night. Vaya Con Dios.