Quasi Point Break News

Patrick Swayze, the actor who portrayed Bodhi in Point Break was reportedly diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Some news sources (the National Enquirer and the Superficial) are reporting that the Bodhizafta has but five weeks to live.

I certainly hope the reports are exaggerated...Bodhi deserves an honorable, badass death. This is how I see his real death going down: Bodhi and Johnny Utah meet at an Australian beach during the 50-year storm. Huge tsunamis are crashing down all around them. Then Utah walks up behind Bodhi and throws a Ronald Reagan mask on the waves beside him and asks "lose something, bra?" The two proceed to fight, with Utah handcuffing himself to Bodhi in the waves. Upon seeing the incoming Australian SWAT team ready to mop up on the arrest, Utah lets Bodhi go for one last go at the waves. Bodhi paddles out on his surfboard and the flabbergasted Australian SWAT team informs Utah that they'll get him when he comes back in. Utah nonchalantly says, "he's not coming back," as a huge tsunami envelopes Bodhi and carries him to the afterlife. Utah then tosses his FBI badge in the ocean and the sounds of Ratt serenade and comfort us in the death of surfing/bank robbing guru Bodhi.

But that's just how I imagine his death. If the prognosis is indeed true, in the words of Special Agent Utah: "Hey Bodhi, Vaya con dios."

Bodhi: "Yo Johnny, I'll see you in the next life!"