Motherfucking rat bastard of all motherfucking bastards

My day started out well. I had a telephonic status conference with an ALJ. Of course he called in late, making me dangerously close to late for my departure time to court. As a result, I had to step on the pedal a little bit in order to make the first real court appearance on time. On the way to this particular county seat there is a section that goes from 55 mph to 35 mph in under a block. As I was doing about 65 in the 55 stretch, I didn't hit the brakes immediately at the change of speed limit.

Low and behold I get pulled over by some trooper hanging out. He's the state traffic officer who I work with regularly on criminal traffic cases. I expect a smirk and warning to slow down. Nope, the motherfucking rat bastard gives me a ticket for doing 60 in a 35 zone. For those of you unaware, this is a 4 point $200.00 plus ticket with a fifteen day license suspension, apparently effective immediately.

So why am I so pissed? There's a fucking code, and this jackass didn't honor it. When you work in the courthouse, you get a nod and a warning. Ticketing me makes this fucker no better than a canibal. Moreover, he's a particular jackass because he didn't alter the "radar reading" to prevent a suspension of my license. Since I'm apparently grounded for two weeks, I'm not sure how they plan on me being in court. I sure as shit won't be taking a taxi to my jury trial next week.

Mark my words: they will have to drag my bloody corpse to jail to take any fine money because I'm not paying one cent for this act of traitorous bastardom.