Go away, Monkey

As some of you know, I tend to love things that others consider...bad. So I figured that I would love the show "Cavemen," styled after the Geico commercials. I gave it five minutes of my life. I'd do anything to get those minutes back.

MAN, was that show fucking terrible. A show only has a few minutes to get your attention for the length of the series. Seinfeld began by talking about the useless button on the top of a shirt, the O.C. featured Ryan Atwood aiding and abetting a car theft only to end up in juvie, and Nip/Tuck's first episode was just about the greatest thing God ever created. Cavemen started like a regular sitcom...a bad sitcom. None of the jokes were funny in the traditional sitcom sense, or the novelty caveman sense. I won't even rehash the horrible five minute introduction, but for God's sake, if you don't have a great intro, at least play to the generic strengths of the series: Prehistoric Man. I didn't hear one bit of caveman humor throughout the entire introduction.

So in the immortal words of Nip/Tucks first episode, i give any television producers reading this post some advice: "I think we need to hire a full time psychologist to screen better." [As you tie hams to a corpse to feed it to alligators]